DJ is one of those rare souls, a kind and gentle soul who genuinely embodies the purity of kindness, compassion, and heart. What needs to be said that we don’t already know and feel having been around him? It’s the reason we are all here, to show our love and support to Sue and her family, and to share in the grief.

I met DJ when I was 15. I honestly can’t remember any of Sue’s other boyfriends before him, maybe because I was so young or maybe because DJ is that memorable. I thought “oh, he’s a good one for Sue”. They made a great pair, sharing a deep love and friendship, and always knowing to make every minute count. In the years that followed, we didn’t see much of each other, but when we did, DJ was always the same warm soul, constant and steadfast. Along with his warmth, he had strength, not the overt strength you see in people with large muscles, but the enduring strength, both physically and emotionally to handle all the challenges that life had thrown his way. I am sure with Sue he may have complained about his pains, but to many of us, he rarely showed it. With DJ, I saw mostly calmness and peace in his heart.

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We each have our own reasons why we love DJ. For me, it’s the many aspects that make up DJ. For his style, he always had a charming rockabilly, hip look, often with his cap. For his mind, he had a quick wit with broad, eclectic tastes and interests. For his heart, he had sincerity and generosity.

As I keep DJ in my heart, I will try to remember his spirit of kindness whenever life’s challenges make it difficult to find the silver lining or nugget of goodness.

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I believe the poem, “Hug o’ War”, by Shel Silverstein, captures DJ’s spirit best. It reads:

I will not play at tug o' war.

I'd rather play at hug o' war,

Where everyone hugs

Instead of tugs,

Where everyone giggles

And rolls on the rug,

Where everyone kisses,

And everyone grins,

And everyone cuddles,

And everyone wins.

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Lastly, aside from all the wonderful qualities that I’ve already mentioned, I cannot forget to note one of DJ’s most endearing qualities, which is his fun and sometimes wicked sense of humor. In a recent text with him, Sue, and a few other folks, I noticed that Sue had [capital I; capital C; capital E] “ICE“ for DJ. This, of course, begged the question “what does that stand for?“ to which Sue responded, “he’s my ‘In Case of Emergency’”, and then DJ responded with “That's me baby. Ice Ice (as in Vanilla Ice).”